My Stories
These are true or fictional stories, with the true ones learned through sometimes painful and funny life experience.
When The Sound Goes Out In The Movie Theater
Published August 1, 2026
The hardest part of being divorced is learning to go out again. Going out solo feels agoraphobic, with conversations amplified, the awkwardness apparent, the ring still on the finger. It took forever to become comfortable in my own skin again, dump the ring, and learn to appreciate myself for who I am.
What Happens When You’re In a “Do Loop”
Published July 29, 2026
I’ve been in meeting after meeting where some non-programmer will say, “It appears we’re in a Do-Loop.” The intention is to indicate that they’re in a situation that’s impossible to get out of, or a “do loop” with no exit plan. A Do-Loop (by itself) is the same thing as doing something for an infinite amount of time.
Reality
Published July 29, 2026
Clouds of veracity, I sink into never. I haven’t seen your face in forever. Eternal delight, I’m thinking in time, The warmth of your touch and your hand in mine.
Rosie, The Firefox
Published July 29, 2026
When I met Pauli Loeffler in 2011, we immediately connected over karaoke and cats. She had an aging Maine Coon named Taffy, and with the cat having diabetes and other health issues, we knew it was time for her to go.
C.Y.A., Challenge Your Assumptions
Published January 12, 2026
I was fast-tracked through the Government through a special program when I was fresh out of college. As a result of reaching a certain pay grade, I was required to attend a lot of training in a short amount of time.
Hi, I’m Married
Published January 10, 2026
In my agency days as a website builder, new hires were still a relatively rare occurrence. Wanting to be friendly, I considered introducing myself to a recent new hire; I stopped because of “the Curse.”
The Types of Drivers to Avoid
Published December 29, 2025
Your favorite song is playing on the radio as you drive on the freeway at a comfortable sixty-five miles an hour. The sun is behind you as the day finally comes to an end. The car’s temperature is cool, and your mind begins to relax. All seems well until a car cuts in front of you, forcing you to slam on the brakes and change lanes to prevent a fifty-car pileup.
My Friend and Girls
Published December 29, 2025
My friend Jason tends to rationalize optimistically when it comes to girls. He is the type of person who will meet a girl, exchange a few words with her, and then walk away thinking she likes him. In reality, when he brags about girls, he either overestimates their enthusiasm or totally misinterprets the situation altogether. For example, one evening, I was on the patio when he ran outside to tell me about a girl he met at G.N.C.
The Rejection
Published December 29, 2025
When 5th grade ended, I was well on my way to middle school. This time it would be 6th grade, a new school, lockers, and a different classroom for every period. It took a lot of adjusting for me, and I never really got into the groove. When I saw her again in sixth grade, she was totally different. She dressed like a gang member. She was rude to me. She wasn’t the angel I remembered.
Refer to Your Notes
Published December 29, 2025
A senior executive at a company was being briefed on a new product line. A division manager was briefing the slides when the executive interrupted. “Bob, I just want to commend you on your briefing slides. They are rather excellent. In fact, they are the best slides I have ever seen.”